Here you will find my personal journals for the last 3 years and counting. “This is HBomb” was formed back in 2022 when both of my children and I were in the middle of a huge life change. When I made this page my reality was very different than it is now. I have dedicated myself to documenting learning to embrace the many changes that have come from the challenges my family and I face.

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Trying to clean up my lifetime of trauma and attain contentment, learn what true happiness is has been remarkable. Obviously, I have had a lot to say in these writings, videos, and photos. I divulge many emotions, my innermost fears, work through quandary, vent in anger, and try my hardest to adapt to my everchanging surroundings.

My life has not been one of love, ease or generosity. Coming out of the abuse from my past has guided my entire being. I have been changing so rapidly I cannot keep up with myself. I am not a therapist, life coach or mentor. I am merely a creature formed by my environment. I have an inordinate understanding of hardship, struggling to find a healthy way forward. I am asked daily, “how do you do it?” I literally have to read about it to answer that because I truly cannot say “how”, only that I just juggernaut through as hard as I can.

 

Through this journey of healing and self-discovery I am learning a lot about my physical and mental health. I found a way to feel productive for my family while dealing with an odd set of disabilities, this is a goal I’ve set and accomplished with this page: Adaptation of old hobbies/coping skills to new modification of my life and physical being. Learning self-appreciation and how to embrace my whole self. I felt my past influences had watered me down and even caused me to be an unauthentic version of myself. It was a fact! I have found the core I needed to see – fully exposed.

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Starting this blog was a great decision. I feel it is helping in a unique way. I feel very good about it, and I have gotten some great feedback. I have made some amazing long-term friends who know me on a level no one else does!

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I originally said, “This site is a eulogy to who I was and a tribute to who I am becoming, evolving with me as I explore.”, I feel this still rings true! I wanted to “euthanize my victimization”. I know now that it is not shameful or demeaning to admit that I was victimized. I am learning a lot! I’m feeling better because of it!

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